Child is Struggling in School? How to Help Your Child Succeed

When your child is struggling in school, it can be heartbreaking and frustrating. Whether it’s difficulty keeping up with homework, a diagnosis like ADHD or dyslexia, or emotional challenges like anxiety, many children face hurdles in the classroom. As a parent or caregiver, it’s essential to know how to spot the signs and how to help your child move forward with the support they need to succeed in school.

Let’s walk through actionable strategies to address school struggles, rebuild confidence, and create a safe space for learning and growth.

Understanding Why Your Child Is Struggling in School

Spotting the Signs of Academic Struggle

The first step in helping is recognizing that a child is struggling in the first place. Many kids hide their difficulties, especially if they feel ashamed or anxious.

Common signs a child is having trouble at school:

• Avoiding homework
• Refusing to go to school
• Expressing worry or saying “I’m stupid”
• Falling behind in grade-level expectations
• Acting out at home due to built-up frustration

If you suspect your child is struggling, take note of any patterns. Keep track of academic performance, emotional changes, and even sleep habits. These behaviors can help pinpoint what’s going on.

Common Learning and Emotional Challenges

Children may struggle due to learning disabilities, emotional or mental health concerns, or environmental factors.

• ADHD: Can affect focus, task completion, and behavior
• Dyslexia: Affects reading fluency and spelling
• Autism: May affect social skills, sensory processing, or transitions
• Anxiety: Can make it hard for a child to go to school or complete work

If your child may feel anxious, overwhelmed, or easily distracted, these concerns need to be addressed with empathy and the right resources.

How to Talk to Your Child About School Struggles

Let Your Child Know They’re Not Alone

If you notice your child is feeling upset, create a calm environment to open the conversation. Let them know that you see they’re struggling — and that it’s okay to talk about it.

Use gentle language:

• “I noticed homework has been a challenge lately. Want to talk about it?”
• “It’s okay to have a hard time sometimes. I’m here to help you.”

This approach supports your child’s self-esteem and helps them feel safe. Children’s development depends heavily on knowing their emotions are valid and that adults are ready to support them.

Help Them Feel Heard and Supported When They Feel Anxious

Sometimes kids are struggling not because of grades, but because of something emotional — like anxiety, worry, or social stress. When a child may feel misunderstood, simply listening can make all the difference.

• Ask open-ended questions
• Validate their feelings
• Avoid rushing into solutions

These small steps build trust and help them become active participants in their own success.

Partnering with Teachers and Providers

Talk to Your Child’s Teacher

If you’re unsure how to move forward, start by speaking with your child’s teacher. Teachers can offer insight into:

• In-class behavior and participation
• Social interactions
• Areas of academic struggle

Talk to your child’s teacher with curiosity, not blame. Ask what they’ve observed and what’s causing concern. Ask if there are online resources or school-based interventions available. The school may already have helpful tools in place — or be able to guide you to next steps.

Involve Your Child’s Health Care Provider

When academic issues persist, it may be time to consult your child’s health care provider. They can screen for underlying medical, developmental, or emotional issues and offer referrals to:

• A psychologist for assessments
• A therapist for emotional support
• An occupational therapist for sensory or motor needs

Getting the right support early can help your child succeed long-term — both inside and outside of school.

Create a Supportive Routine at Home

Consistency Helps Kids Who Struggle in School

A predictable routine reduces stress for children. If your child is struggling in school, establishing a structure at home can make their day feel more manageable and safe.

• Designate quiet, distraction-free homework time
• Set regular bedtimes to support brain function
• Build in breaks and play to relieve frustration
• Use visual charts or checklists if your child benefits from seeing daily tasks

Even small changes can help them feel less anxious and more in control. Routines support executive function and emotional regulation—two skills many struggling learners are still developing.

Use Encouragement to Build Confidence

When a child may be feeling defeated by grades or schoolwork, encouragement matters. Praise their effort, not just outcomes.

Try phrases like:

• “I saw how hard you worked—that may help more than you know.”
• “You kept going even when it was hard. That’s the kind of strength that leads to success.”

This type of positive reinforcement improves your child’s self-esteem and can motivate them to keep trying—even when it’s tough.

Leverage Extra Support and Resources

Explore Academic Support Options

If your child is struggling with homework or grades, extra help outside the classroom can make a big difference.

Support may include:

• Working with a tutor who specializes in your child’s subject or learning style
• Using online resources that explain concepts in new ways
• Looking into peer mentoring or after-school homework clubs

If your child isn’t responding to traditional instruction, changing the method—not the goal—can be key.

Consider an Evaluation for Learning Differences

If the struggle continues despite support, and especially if there’s a family history of ADHD, dyslexia, or autism, ask your school or provider about a formal evaluation.

This might include:

• Psychoeducational testing from a psychologist
• A screening through your child’s school
• A referral to an occupational therapist or specialist

A diagnosis may unlock services like an IEP (Individualized Education Program) or 504 Plan, giving your child the kind of support they need to succeed.

Manage Emotional and Mental Health Alongside Academics

Addressing Anxiety and Emotional Stress

Feeling anxious about school can be just as debilitating as a learning issue. Some children feel anxious to the point of school refusal, tears, or physical symptoms.

Watch for:

• Refusing to go to school
• Headaches or stomachaches in the morning
• Panic around tests or presentations

If you see these signs, consult a therapist or child psychologist. Therapy can help kids learn to cope, reframe fear, and feel safe again in academic environments.

Reassure and Empower Your Child

Above all, let your child know that you’re on their team. Say things like:

• “It’s okay that school feels hard right now.”
• “We’re going to figure this out together.”
• “I’m proud of you for telling me what you need.”

When children know their caregivers want to help, they’re more likely to open up, seek guidance, and build resilience.

What Parents Can Do: Action Steps to Support Your Child

• Talk to your child’s teacher and maintain open communication
• Speak with your child’s health care provider if emotional or developmental concerns arise
• Set up a consistent homework routine with visual supports
• Praise effort and problem-solving over grades
• Use online resources and tutors for additional academic support
• Explore evaluations if a disability is suspected
• Foster your child’s mental health and emotional safety

Why More Kids Are Struggling To Want To Go To School

In today’s fast-paced and high-pressure environment, it’s becoming more common to see a child struggling not just academically, but emotionally—especially when it comes to motivation. Many children express anxiety, boredom, or even dread at the thought of attending class. But what’s behind this resistance?

Understanding the Root Causes

A child’s feelings about school can be shaped by many factors: social pressure, learning difficulties, bullying, or simply the fear of failure. If your child needs more support than they’re currently receiving, even small tasks may feel overwhelming.

You may notice your child get upset before school, or frequently complain of stomachaches and headaches. These physical symptoms often mask deeper emotional discomfort.

This is when it's important to step in and help if your child seems unusually resistant to going to school. Start by having open, judgment-free conversations. Ask what’s been hardest lately. Listen more than you talk. Let them know their voice matters.

Brainstorm Solutions Together

Don’t feel you need to fix everything immediately. Instead, brainstorm ways to improve their experience:

• Could a seating change in class help?
• Do they need a check-in buddy or mentor at school?
• Would a small academic success at home boost their confidence?

Including your child in the problem-solving process empowers them and often reduces feelings of helplessness.

Support from the Whole Family Helps

Managing school struggles isn’t just a task for one parent—it’s something the whole family can rally behind. Maybe an older sibling can share their own past school challenges. Or perhaps dinner conversations can include everyone’s “win of the day,” helping shift the focus to positive moments.

Remember, parental involvement—without added pressure—is one of the strongest predictors of student success. Your calm presence and willingness to advocate is often what a child struggling needs most.

Even if they don’t say it aloud, they’ll feel the difference.

Final Thoughts: Helping Your Child Move Forward

If your child is struggling in school, remember you’re not alone—and neither are they. With the right approach and a bit of patience, you can support your child in finding what works for them.

Every child has strengths. Every child can thrive with the right support.

By listening, learning, and taking action, you’re not just helping them with school struggles—you’re teaching them how to face challenges with confidence.